TARG Zine

Lordy Lordy Look Who’s 40 & Who’s Entering Their Dirty 30’s. The July TARG ZINE Is Out!

Yep, the cover of the 40th issue of TARG ZINE features Double Dragon Birthday boys Spike & Hammer who turn 30 this month. Amazing!

INSIDE ISSUE #40 - Chef Sammy & his merry band of Perogi Wizards have created a new out-of-this world Perogi masterpiece - check our menu for details, learn all about our NEW & IMPROVED SUMMER WEEK NITE SHOWS - a special program aimed at making live music fans less grumpy at work, Curtis keeps getting weirder weirder - checkout his latest “Adventures of TARG” comic, SLO’ TOM tangles with Chipnut again & fields a question about crime all in his advice column, Pinball Josh of Ottawapinball.com continues his Obscure Summer Series by bringing in one extremely rare & unusual arcade oddity to TARG every month - read all about the latest addition: ROBOT an incredibly freaky 1984 pinball machine by the very strange Italian manufacturer ZACCARIA. We have 5 new games on location this month - all of them are covered in TARG ZINE. Josh created a custom DJ KJMAXX (of Toughen Up! Sunday Free Play fame) action figure to help imagine a didactic encounter with the Karate Kid in his Toys R Josh comic, FINS UP! We have a new island-styled brew in the TARG beer fridge, KJMAXX counts down the top 10 Free-Play Jamz of June, Big Bern gives us an exegesis on the rarely played 1981 Namco game “New Rally-X” in this months Video Game Superguide, Ska Jeff took a break from his Hi Fives article this month, but don’t worry we included a nice photo documenting his mop head replacement training session along with pics of other neat stuff that happened at TARG last month. Thank god for Monty & his Master Class articles or we would all suck at pinball - this month he's dishing out tips for our new BATMAN FOREVER wide body pin. The Hall of Wizards, the official leaderboard for our monthly free pinball tournaments is up to date & things are heating up - Next tournament is Wed Aug 23. There’s also some big news about V.I.P. passes for The Pinball event of the year - The Ottawa Pinball & Gameroom Show - Canada’s longest running Annual Pinball Expo, Jennilee has a cute summer wizard for you to colour, Petr Maur snapped a fun photo of Ottawa’s newest new wave super group The New Calling for this months TARG Pin-Up & of course, everything you need to know about all the amazing July shows at TARG can be found in Yogi’s Perogram. Grab yer copy at the arcade or download it here   

ISSUE #39 of TARG ZINE: READY FOR NEW SWEARS WEEKEND + SOME JUNE BANANAS ACTION?

Our pal Alex’s heavily photo-shopped mug adorns the cover & rightfully so. A big chunk of June at TARG is dedicated to celebrating the release of “…and the Magic of Horses”, a forthcoming album by NEW SWEARS. We’ve got a whole weekend of back to back shows to give these guys the love & encouragement their hard work deserves.

INSIDE THE JUNE 2017 TARG ZINE: Father’s day is approaching fast - do you have what it takes to beat HIM at the “you vs Dad” wizard challenge? There are only winners all around when you attend our first Father’s Day Free-Play Brunch buffet… details inside. Ottawa’s Synthesizer Festival … S.O.S.fest hits TARG this month - your chance to to hear live tunes from some of the best electronic artists around the globe - get your robot on. Curtis pays homage to some home-brewed TV genius & slime in his ADVENTURES OF TARG comic, Ya, we know Canada 150 is a big deal in the nation’s capital, but have you heard about SKANADA DAY? Danny Rebel is dropping his new release at TARG on July 1st and the very popular VOICE OF THE PEOPLE SKA NITE gang is backing up this insane Canada Day Party - if huge crowds and tourist attractions aren’t your thing take refuge in a classic arcade and skank the nite away! The perfect summer pint is waiting for you… keep your eyes on our taps. You gotta see it to be it - get pumped full of inspiration from the the women of S.O.S.fest as they reveal their muses, Josh arranges a leave vacation for some PEZ dispensers, Star Wars stars, & superhero action figures in his highly unusual TOYS R JOSH comic strip, BIG BERNIE takes a break from the potato chips and shares some BURGER TIME knowledge, SLO' TOM addresses seasonal depression disorder, career planning & sagely band info in his advice column, Ska jeff counts down his fave electropunk albums, DJ KJMAXX shares the top 10 SUNDAY FREE-PLAY arcade jams of last month, MONTY "Bonds" with his loyal Monthly Free Pinball Tournament gang over some GOLDENEYE Pinball tips, important news for pinball enthusiast on page 18, help Ottawa’s most fun "boy band" complete 6 challenging task on the NEW SWEARS FUN BOY ACTIVITY PAGE, Wizard Elixir Jennilee makes it easy to show how much you love yer dad with her father’s day colouring page….. Sick of New Swears yet? Hope not cause photo-hound Petr Maur captured a pretty wicked snapshot of them shooting up the the arcade with lazer gunz for the June Targ Pin up, and finally everything you need to know about this months amazing line-up of entertainment at TARG in YOGI’S  PEROGRAM. Grap yer copy at the arcade or DOWNLOAD IT HERE. 

DROP THE GLOVES… SO YOU CAN READ ISSUE #38 OF TARG ZINE.

A little bit of hockey stuff, arcade stuff, music stuff and tons of silly fun stuff. 

INSIDE THE MAY ISSUE: everything you need to know about the 1st ever TARG Mother’s Day Brunch Buffet - casual, delicious & fun for the whole family, Did you know we changing our name next month? Get the exciting scoop. Curtis has another hilarious ADVENTURES OF TARG COMIC for us, get the skinny on our new futuristic warfare driving game & news about latest additions to the TARG beer fridge, Toughen Up Free-Play Sunday DJ KJMAXX counts down the wickedest wax jams of April. Are you in the throes of Play-Off fever? Cool off with our ARCADE HOCKEY GUIDE, Alien drones, Dr. Evil, Frankenstein & his Bride all make an appearance in Josh’s side splitting toys comic, Professor Bernie takes a break from video game tips and instead gives us a top 10 of his fave food - Potato Chip! So many different kinds now eh! SLO’ TOM covers softwood lumber, Hockey history & how to get your crappy band a gig all in one advice column,AMAZING! SKA JEFF counts down 5 Marvel Super hero groups that made him the man he is today in HI-FIVES, Monty lends some wizard level pool hustling tips in his EIGHT BALL DELUXE Pinball Master Class, checkout the current standing on the HALL OF WIZARDS monthly FREE pinball Tournament Leaderboard, info about 2 upcoming Pinball Expos you will want to know about. We are nuts about mini bikes at TARG these days so we put together a photo essay on the topic & guess what? It is silly. Elixir Wizard Jennilee has a fun illustration you can colour and give to mom, local photographer Scott Doubt captured an unusual TARGYEAR3 moment for this months Pin-Up & of course the music GPS that is Yogi’s Perogram explains all the concerts & events taking place in May so that you can plan your social calendar. Grab your copy at the arcade or...

TARG YEAR III ANNIVERSARY ISSUE ZINE

Yep TARG turns 3 on Mon April 17 & we have a mega fun anniversary party planned featuring some Punk, Rock, Metal & Limbo - details inside the pages of TARG ZINE. Who better than the mega talented PAT BUCK to illustrate the cover of this very special issue - he is attached to the skilled hands that created the many fantastic murals at TARG… & those hands will be laying down more magic on our walls this month - stay tuned. 

INSIDE ISSUE #37: JUNO ’17 host Byan Adams makes an appearance in THE ADVENTURES of TARG comic, METAL UP YOUR CATS is back with an oldie but a goodie - Val Halla interviews AXXION drummer Emily about her cats, KJ MAXX’S WICKED WAX is a new column that lists the 10 top FREE-PLAY Sunday jams - a convenient  playlist resource intended to help get you through trying times at your bleak office job, get into the Juno spirit with our MUSIC NERD GUIDE TO OTTAWA JUNO AWARD HEROES (ya we know the same article appeared in last months issue - sue us), Dracula visits Mc D’s, Pac-Man spices things up & Mr. T tries Vietnamese cuisine in the TOYS R JOSH comic, learn all about the April Wizard of The Month - JOEL... he’s not just a pretty head of hair ya know? SLO’ TOM clarifies why the JUNO awards didn’t take place in 1988 & answers an age old musical question in his advice column, SKA JEFF counts down his top 5 sketch comedy shows, Ottawa Rock Photographer ANDREW CARVER shares some sweet shots of wicked TARG YEAR III shows, if you are GREEDY for a high score, MONTY has some MASTER CLASS tips to help get your name on The Addams Family Pinball machine (next free monthly tournament is Wed April 5 - all skill levels welcome), Professor Bernie shares some video games of olympic proportions in BIG BERN’S BITS & BYTES. We love to see people absorbed with colouring at the arcade so ELIXIR WIZARD JENNILEE has got you covered with yet another amazing illustration, the April TARG PIN UP OF THE MONTH is a band that has played TARG nearly more than anyone else in Year III, can you guess who it is? And finally everything you need to know about all the fun stuff happening this month can be found in YOGI’s PEROGRAM.  Grab your copy at the Arcade or DOWNLOAD IT HERE

 

ISSUE #36? - CAN'T BE. THAT’S THREE YEARS OF TARG ZINE!

True story. Thanks for reading and supporting our little publication.
The mega talented Wizard Jennilee illustrated an adorable colour cover for this special issue - but don’t worry - we put a version of it on the back page for you to colour - we know colouring relaxes you.

INSIDE THE MARCH ISSUE: Round up the kids - we are extending our Family Friendly hours on March 15 11am-8pm for our annual MARCH BREAK PINBALL PARTY FOR KIDS - read all about it. Curtis has another weird Adventures of TARG comic for yaz - he has come through with side splitting, head scratching funnies for every issue since #1 - thanks for being the most prolific TARG Zine contributor Curtis! MONTY leads the human resistance against SkyNet with his Pinball Master Class lesson for Terminator 2. THE HALL OF WIZARDS leaderboard has been updated with the top 10 ballers of 2017… so far. You can join this esteemed group by participating in our Monthly Free Pinball Tournaments - news about the next one in TARG Zine. ARCADE UPDATE gives you a glimpse into the future - we will have some new games on location this month plus a rad new upgrade to our SUPER CHEXX Bubble Hockey game - too cool to mention here. Read “A Music Nerd’s Guide to Ottawa Juno Award Heroes” & impress/bore you friends with your newfound knowledge. The Bionic Woman, Alien & George the Animal Steele (R.I.P.) all make an appearance in the TOYS R JOSH comic strip. There are a few new faces in the Perogi Kitchen - meet DAVEY the March Wizard of The Month, SLO’ TOM answers a dating question, a guitar amplifier question and recounts a truly bizarre animal attack story in this months advice column. SKA JEFF’s Hi FIVES will get you primed for the 2 90’s PUNK COVER NITES happening this month. We have a wonderful update about our 1st CLOTHING SWAP last month… the community participation was phenomenal. Thanks for giving Ottawa. One of TARG’s favourite "musicians, B.A. Johnston just released his 11th studio album, Gremlins 3 - we asked him some questions about his highly unusual music video for “DRIVE THRU BEEF” a song about the perils of Fast Food Dinning. Professor BERNIE gives you the straight goods on Super PAC-MAN in his Video Game Super-guide. Petr Maur captures the goofy side of heavy sludge masters SWARM OF SPHERES in this months TARG Pin-Up and finally everything you need to know about all the fun shows coming your way in March can be found in YOGI’S PEROGRAM. Grab yer copy at the arcade or...

WE ARE NOT WORTHY! ISSUE #35 OF TARG ZINE NOW AVAILABLE.

The cult comedy classic  WAYNE’s WORLD turns 25 this month. GM BG (great movie, bad game). 

INSIDE THE FEBRUARY ISSUE OF TARG ZINE:
Got a big heart but a tiny bank account? No problem - we have 4 arcade themed valentines cards that you can clip out and give to your “lucky” loved ones. "The Adventures of TARG” is the longest running feature in TARG ZINE, it has appeared ever since issue ONE and CURTIS has supplied us with yet another rib tickler. Learn how to rip it up on SKATEBALL pinball in MONTY’S MASTER CLASS. Did you know we have a fun PUNK PINBALL LEAGUE Showdown every month? It’s free to get in on the action + TARG ZINE keeps tabs on the action of your progress in the HALL OF WIZARDS LEADERBOARD. Family Day is coming up and Old Ottawa South has some fun scenes for wicked holiday hangs - read all about it! WIZARD JOSH digs deep into his treasure chest of action figures for some wild comic book drama involving Jason, Freddy, Skeletor & Yoda—WHAAAAT? THE GRINDMOTHER is coming to TARG in March - Learn everything you need to know about the Worlds oldest and coolest extreme metal vocalist. SLO TOM gets into some hot water with alternative facts regarding omelettes - too arduous to get into with this summary - so read it for yourself. A little known fact - House of TARG also has a license to operate as cruise ship - and on VALENTINES DAY you can get your romantic sea legs straight at REMI ROYALE’S LOVE BOAT: Valentines Voyage - again too hard & unusual to explain here. Ever wonder what you have to do about reducing your carbon footprint? Just peel the pages of TARG ZINE to get info about THE TARG CLOTHING SWAP - We can’t believe this hasn’t happened already! By now, everyone knows that SKA JEFF was raised by a Commodore 64 home computer - so no surprise that he gives us a very Hi Fives of his fave WRASTLIN’ video games, Don’t count BERNARD out - he’s got some serious tips about a mega classic in his VIDEO GAME SUPER GUIDE. The mega talented Elixir Wizard Jennilee gives you a thoughtful Perogi image to colour with crayons (available at the arcade) - peace guaranteed. We keep asking master SHUTTERBUG Petr Maur to take pics of wicked Ottawa bands for the monthly TARG PIN-UP  - and thankfully he keeps saying yes... check out his glorious photo Thünderkok - the band with the best pants! And finally, The real reason you are excited about TARG ZINE - YOGI’S PEROGRAM - everything you need to know about everything that is going down for February.

Grab it at the arcade or download it here. 

A New Year, A New Hope & A New Issue of TARG ZINE

INSIDE ISSUE #34
So many amazing shows & events this month at TARG - the January Wizard Picks will help guide you, Felix reviews a recording by Santa Rosa California punk band ACRYLICS, Monty gives us some IRON MAN Multiball tips in his latest MASTER CLASS, Breaking News about a Perogi experiment we are conducting in January, Curtis has a new side splitting ADVENTURES OF TARG Comic, SLO’ TOM “ helps" some zine readers with Hot Dog, Anxiety & Financial problems in his Advice Column, Star Wars, M*A*S*H, Batman & Friday The 13th are all featured in the hilarious TOYS R JOSH comic. Ever wonder how Princess Leia did that wicked hairdo? Well we teach you how - STEP BY STEP, get to know the gals in Montreal’s PALE LIPS better by checking out their exclusive TARG ZINE interview, SKA JEFF has compiled a list of CRUCIAL 613 recordings released in 2016 (and we have link to all the music so you can check it out), BIG BERN gives us the scoop on a tough game from his youth in the VIDEO GAME SUPERGUIDE, Wizard Jennilee illustrated some adorable perogies for you to colour, PETR MAUR caught Ottawa Punk band GOAT on camera for the TARG PIN-UP & of course everything you need to know about this months solid line-up of shows can be found in YOGI’s PEROGRAM. Grab yer copy at the ARCADE or
DOWNLOAD THE PDF HERE
 

ISSUE #33 OF TARG ZINE - YOUR GUIDE TO QUALITY HOLIDAY HANGS AT THE ARCADE

INSIDE THE DEC ISSUE OF TARG ZINE: Monty delivers another MASTER CLASS with everything you need to know about the Multiball modes in one of the best pins ever made... METALLICA  PINBALL, the results are in from our last Monthly Free Pinball tournament - checkout Ottawa’s top ballers for November, Skrew the Mall - get it done at the Arcade - we have some holiday shopping tips for ya, you will “Die Hard Laughing” while reading Curtis’ Adventures of TARG Comic, SLO’ TOM shares some of his personal Yuletide traditions… yep they are bizarre, James T Kirk, Batman, Superman and a new face from ROGUE ONE make appearances in Josh’s hilarious TOYS R JOSH comic, 2016 wasn’t the greatest year of all time but we had some pretty amazing shows - so the TARG Wizards compiled a Best Of list, SKA JEFF counts down his 5 fave xmas Rap Songs so you can sweeten up your holiday playlist, Professor Bernie gives us the straight goods on SPACE INVADERS in his Video Game Super Guide, Elixer Wizard Jennilee gives us the last colouring page of 2016, the Dec pin-up features an entertainer we guarantee you have never heard of (but that will all change after our Season’s Beatings Xmas Parties this month) and finally everything you need to know about the amazing #TARGHolidayHangs can be found in Yogi’s Perogram.  Grab one at the Arcade or....
DOWNLOAD TARG ZINE HERE

SURFS UP & SO IS ISSUE #32 OF TARG ZINE

This months front cover features a groovy illustration by Marc Audet (Rocket57.com) taken from the 2016 SURF & TURF Gig poster. Surf & Turf is an annual 2 nite Surf, Garage Rock, Instro Festival expertly curated by THE Shanker & Jeff Welch. This year we welcome bands from Vermont, Kingston, Ottawa + Toronto Garage Legends THE LEATHER UPPERS - Nov 11 & 12 at TARG.

INSIDE THE NOVEMBER ISSUE OF TARG ZINE:
November is GO time for the Mustaches For Kids dudes - learn about their recent good deeds & stash farming plans, Felix the millennial graciously lends us a killer record review from his CRINK Zine. Reading Monty’s Master Class will make you a better pinball player - this month strategies for KISS are discussed, Professor Bernie has some tips & tricks for GAUNTLET in his Superguide, Curtis pulls at your heart strings and whacks yer funny bone with his Adventures of TARG Comic, SLO’ TOM has some expert relationship & fast-food advice. Did you know some of Josh’s action figures are on Tinder now? Find out how that goes in the Toys R Josh comix, Mr. Wiggles is featured in “METAL UP YOU CATS” - find out who his daddy is by reading Val Halla’s monthly column, You won’t be DISappointed SKA JEFF Hi-Fives list this month, Ottawa music legend Patrick Shanks gives us a rundown of everyones fave Cancon Garage-Punk Hitmakers in his article “Canada’s Coolest”. Need some new music in your life? Check out the Wizard Music Chart to see what the TARG staff has been listening to recently PLUS everything you need to know about the November events at TARG can be found in Yogi’s Perogram. Drop by the Arcade or Download issue #31 of TARG Zine here. 

GAME OVER: The October Halloween Edition of TARG Zine is DEAD simple to Download or EXHUME from the Arcade.

Inside Issue #31:
Halloween is a big deal for the Wizards at TARG and we have 6 events planned this month to help you celebrate - read all about it. We have some great news to share about our Beaus’s Oktoberfest fund raising efforts for Ottawa Rock Camp for Girls & For Pivots Sake, CRINKmeister FELIX  has another underground punk/hardcore record review for you, MONTY’s MASTERCLASS is your source for Pinball strategies & tips - World Cup Soccer 94 is covered this month, just in time to get you into shape for our monthly FREE PINBALL TOURNAMENT on Wed Oct 19. Professor Bernie shares his thoughts about the wild dirt track racing game Super Off-Road, Curtis has some Tips & Tricks for the best Tricks & Treats, SLO’ TOM covers your quandaries about camping, used clothing & conspiracies in his advice column, TOYS R JOSH features some monstrous scenarios with his spookiest action figures… it will leave you in stitches. VAL HALLA is back with another “ Metal Up Your Cats”. We get to meet Nella & Timo, two furry little buddies that live a certain Metal drummer from Toronto. Ska Jeff counts down his 5 fave Slasher films in his Hi-FIVES Column, Learn some fun facts about Bryan. he’s one half of the Minnesota dance pop dup KOO KOO KANGA ROO, to get you prepped for the Mega Fun Family Hyper Dance Party taking place at TARG on Mon Oct 17, Wizard Elixir Jennilee has a highly unusual amphibious masked wizard for you to colour, Canadian troubadour B.A. Johnston shares the spotlight with Arcade Helper Monkey in the Oct Pin-Up PLUS everything you need to know about the amazing shows & events taking place at TARG this month can be found the PEROGRAM pages. Drop by the Arcade or Download issue #31 of TARG Zine here.